He is patient and forgiving...

I can't believe we are already in March. Well halfway through March...AND Lent!

I think I have mentioned in past posts the importance of the Lenten Season for me. Although I have to admit that this year I have not been reflecting as much as I used to around this time. I guess I've been in a bit of a funk, but in the past few days, I have actually taken time to talk with God and share with Him what is going on with me. I have opened myself up to receive His grace and forgiveness. You see I have this thing where when something doesn't go my way, I complain. And if the person to whom I complain to doesn't "agree" with me, I complain some more. And the more I complain, the more frustrated I get. The more frustrated I get, the less patient I am and the people I love the most are the ones who deal with that side of me.

I sat in my room thinking how much I am seen as a person who values family and would do anything for them and yet there I was making them wrong for things they didn't even know bothered me. There I was crying and complaining for little things that did not matter. I was putting all of the blame on others and not taking responsibility for my sins of gossip and judgement. This is hard for me to admit, but not admitting it is even harder because pretending I don't do either of those things is costing me my happiness and loving relationships with the people I care and love more than anything in the world. 

I am thankful for God's patience. Unlike me, His patience is abundant. He is always patiently waiting to forgive. He never tires of forgiving. It is us who tire of asking for forgiveness. That's what was happening to me this Lenten Season. I had so little patience that I couldn't see God's love and forgiveness. 

Although Lent is halfway over, I still have time to practice love and compassion. I know this doesn't mean things will start going my way all of the time and that it won't  be hard at times not to want to complain, but more time in prayer will give me less time to complain!

Psalm 139: 23-24

Search me, God, and know my heart;

try me and know my anxious thoughts.

See if there is any offensive way in me,

and lead me in the way everlasting.