Thankful...

 

Happy "Twerky" Day!!! Is this a real thing? Don't know how I feel about it, but can't say it didn't make me laugh at little bit. Laughter is something I am especially thankful for this year. It's been a year full of many firsts with out a very special person, but through it all I have been blessed with many wonderful graces to keep me going,  laughter being one that has made me feel a little bit lighter and so so free.

For this laughter I have MANY people to thank. I especially have to thank the big man upstairs because He is the One who made sure to surround me with amazing people. He knew I would need a roommate to help me with the long nights, to bake me banana bread and other goodies, to workout, watch movies with, and of course laugh. He knew I would need housemates that would happily wait for me with open arms every time I come home. Laugh attacks ALL day. He knew I would need a wonderful crew to help me open up and share my story with others. A Spiritual Director who would love me and challenge me to be the best version of myself (pretty sure that didn't mean "twerking" at one point. Ooops, had to do it for the Periwinkle Platypi). He knew I would need mentors with different perspectives to help me grow and be free. Laughter very much present. He continued to surround me with the love and laughter of friends from home. Those I met in high school, others in middle school, and even those from Kindergarten. He surrounded me with friends I met through CLC and other involvements during my time at SCU. And of course, 22 years ago He made sure to surround me with an amazing, strong, and loving family. My three very different, hilarious and protective brothers, my beautiful and brave sister, my wonderful father, and mother with a heart of gold. Lots of cousins too. Aunts and uncles. And my three grandparents as well.

I am so thankful for all of the people in my life who have brought laughter into my life. Life has it's ups and it's down. Sometimes things are really high and happy and other times things are really low and sad, but laughter is welcome in all circumstances. It might seem odd to have laughter during tough times, but without it, things would be so much harder to handle. Laughter is good for the soul and I am so thankful I have been nourished with it through out this year. Thank you family and friends for all of your love and support. For making me laugh and smile. Thank you for allowing me to share with you the life of my wonderful grandma through out my posts and conversations we might have had this year. Her biggest fear was that she would be forgotten. I want to make sure that never happens because even though she isn't here with me today, she will forever be one of my greatest blessings. All the way from Heaven, she too, continues to bring me laughter and joy. I am so incredibly blessed!!!

May you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving filled with lots of laughter and love. <3

  

<3

Side of Ranch please.....

Going out to restaurants is so different for me now that I have actually worked at one myself. I never realized how big of a deal a side of ranch can be when you're the one who has to get it. I honestly could write a whole book on "side of ranch" stories from my three month work experience in the industry.

So the restaurant is divided into sections. The hostess is responsible for rotating different table tops amongst all of the servers. It is also the hostess' responsibility to let the server know when a new table has been seated. Once waters have been taken to the table by the busser, it's up to the server to make sure they have a great experience! I usually liked starting off by asking if I could get them anything to drink besides water. It was rare when being okay with "just water" would happen. This was so different than I imagined since most of the times I had gone out with friends we would all just stick with water. (Secretly that was because no one wanted to pay 2 dollars more and no one wanted to be the one who broke the "just water" streak. Typical.)

Anyway, after getting drinks for the table, I would come back and take the rest of the order. Calamari to start. Arugula salad before the pizza. "Can you get us a side of ranch, please?" "Order's up!" "Can we get more ranch? We love ranch!" "Order's up! Let's go!" I come back to give the table their check...ALL OF THE RANCH IS STILL ON THE TABLE. Great, I'm glad I just burnt my hand on the hot pizza pan just so I could make sure I got them all of the ranch they loved to NOT eat! The things I would do to make sure the customers were happy. I know, that's essentially what I got paid to do and I honestly enjoyed working as a server, but hey I'm human too and getting all of that ranch for them took time away from me getting drinks for another table. Two seconds is a lot of time in the restaurant business!

Not all of the ranch stories were bad though. (I won't get into the time ranch was spilled all over my apron and I had to take orders from 5 tables by memory because I had no where to put my notepad). There was a couple who would come in almost every week with their two little girls. The first two times I served them, they politely asked for a side of ranch.  Eventually, I remembered they liked a side of ranch so I would ask if they would like some before they could ask for it. Remembering something as simple as a side of ranch in this case meant a lot to the customers and it made me happy to be able to go out of my way to make this happen for them. And it was even better when they actually ate it all!!

I myself am a big ranch lover. Ranch is so good with salad, chicken strips, carrots, and pizza! Mozzarella sticks. Bread sticks. It's so good!! But I definitely think twice about asking for a side of ranch now. If I do ask for it though, I am mindful of being patient if they don't get it to me right away. It's not as easy as it looks! Those servers are dealing with more than just orders of a side of ranch!!!


***Would like to dedicate this post to one of my best friends who loves to NOT eat ranch. I don't understand why you don't like it, but at least you will make servers' lives a little easier by not ordering it. You're missing out though :) Also to all of those servers out there dealing with orders of sides of ranch and more!! Y'll deserve a tip ;)

Here's to the Birthday Boy...

Life is full of surprises. Sometimes they are good, and sometimes they can be bad too. Either way, we are never alone. People are put in our lives to share both with them. I have been given lots of great people in my life for the good times and the bad. Today, I would like to acknowledge one of the most important and genuine guys in my life who has been there through it all. He has been my rock and safe haven ever since he came into my life 21 years ago. I could not be more proud of the wonderful man he has become. Sure, he was a little dramatic as a child, throwing tantrums in the store when he wanted to get a toy, but even then there was something special about him. It brings me so much joy when I tell others about him. I am so incredibly blessed to have a brother like him. It is no wonder why my grandma would be filled with so much joy when he walked into the hospital room a year ago today. Even though she was in a lot of pain, she remembered it was his birthday and gave our mom a hard time for not having anything to celebrate it. She always wanted the best for him.

That day we played in the Justin Siena Alumni soccer game. After we finished the game, we got the news that our grandma had been taken back to the hospital. That's something he will be reminded of today and always, but with his heart of gold he will not see it as a sad thing. Instead he will recognize it as a way of remembering and celebrating the wonderful woman who taught him the meaning of unconditional love. He was the sparkle in her eyes during those tough times last November. And he's the sparkle in the eyes of many people, especially now as we are left with only the memories.

Eric, may the Lord bring you all of the happiness and love that you deserve. May you know that you are loved by many. May you feel our grandma's love all the way from Heaven. You know she has connections with the big man upstairs and is telling Him to make your day special today! May you know how proud she is to have a grandson like you. May you know how proud I am for having a brother like you. Thank you for being you. You bring out the real side of me. Those car rides from school or anywhere are some that I hold close in my heart. Driving to see our grandma. Heavy rains and wind. I'll never forget how strong you were behind the wheel that night. I love you beyond words can explain little brother! Wish you the best today and always! <3

HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY!!!

Insanity of 11 months....

I worked out today for the first time in what seems to be forever. Going to the gym is great, but I have found that I really enjoy the "Insanity" workout with Shawn T. I can do it from the comfort of my own home, although let me tell you, there's nothing comfortable about the workout itself. It's insane. Go figure!

After the Pure Cardio workout, I laid on my back on the hard wood floor of my living room. It was a struggle to catch my breath. I should really stop going on those Taco Bell runs. Anyway, I eventually was able to breathe normally and as I exhaled a deep breath out, I finally let myself feel the emotions that come with what today is - the 12th. The day that reminds me of her departure. Unlike other 12th's of past months though, this is the first month that actually takes me back to the moments when my grandma first became sick.

This time last year, she was waiting for me to come home. It was this month when we celebrated her last birthday. I remember being home for my Thanksgiving break and working out to Insanity. My roommate and I had been really good about working out that whole quarter so I couldn't slack off. I introduced my mom and sister to the work out. My grandma thought we were crazy. She could hear us from the living room as we struggled to catch our breath, fought over water, complained, and laughed. She could hear my sister and I enjoying watching our mom trying to do high jumps. Our 50 year old momma was showing us up! Grandma couldn't believe it and gave my mom a hard time about it. She liked being playful with my mom and my mom enjoyed it.

As I finished my work out today, I remembered that moment with my three girls. I miss the four of us having conversations and being with each other. I can't believe it's almost been a year since she left. I miss her more and more every day, but the memories help me carry on. There is so much that reminds me of her. So much that shows me God's grace at work. Even when I work out. Insanity pushes me to dig deeper to get fit, but these past 11 months have pushed me to dig deeper into what God has revealed through everything that has happened since she left.

You continue to surprise me, abuelita. Te quiero <3