An Outpouring of love on 12/12...

Of course the sun would shine bright today. I've been complaining about that 45 degree weather, but this morning as I opened the door to greet my dad, the sun was warm and the sky a beautiful blue. As my roommate came to the door to say goodbye to me, she looked outside and said, "What a beautiful day today in honor of your grandma!" She had just read my thoughts. Today is my grandma's day!

This day will forever bring the pain of having lost my grandma, but mostly be a day to celebrate the wonderful woman she was to everyone she knew. So many people loved her. I always remember going to Mexico and everyone in the town was happy to see her. She knew everyone!!! They knew her for the heart of gold she had, always giving during the Christmas season, giving clothes and toys to the children of poor families. I've often had conversations with my mom about how my grandma used to do this and my mom tells me more stories of how my grandma had been like this since my mom was a little girl. She used to even feed a lot of these kids. My grandma was selfless and so giving. So full of love. It's been hard not having her, but so much has happened this year that has reminded me of her continual presence in my life.

So much that lets me know she is watching over me and protecting me. Even from a distance she shows me her love in little and big ways. Last night for example, a dear friend delivered a manila envelope to me with instructions not to open it until I received a text confirmation from them letting me know to open it. Having woken up bright and early and having had a day filled with deep conversations with different special friends, I decided to call it a night before midnight, which was when I received the text to go ahead and open the envelope. I think it was good I woke up to it instead for what was inside was a beautiful gift of love and support that would help me get out of bed in order embrace the day ahead in honor of my grandma.

In the manila envelope was an outpouring of love for me on this day, 12/12. Friends knew what this day meant for me and they wanted to make sure I knew I had their love and support. My friends never met my grandma yet through the stories I have shared about her, they were able to capture her so well in the notes they wrote for me. They could tell how important she was to me. They know how important it was for me to keep her memory alive and their notes were a testimony to that. It's breathtaking hearing things like "She is still here with us, She reminds me of you, She is proud of you, She will never be forgotten, Although I never met your grandma, I feel like I do, through you."

Thank you to all of the friends who were part of the outpouring of love- whether it was through the notes in the manila folder or texts I have received throughout the day, or conversations I have had with you in the past that helped make me feel loved and helped keep my grandma's memory alive. I have had a beautiful day with my family- mass in her honor- both in Napa and in the Santa Clara Community- bringing flowers to her grave, saying a rosary there for her, witnessing my mom take lead in a beautiful prayer (she never does this in front of others), placing an orchid on her altar that a friend gave me in her honor, dinner with one of her favorite Mexican soups "menudo," and conversations of memories we all have of her! Soon we will be singing her "Las Mañanitas" to celebrate her and La Virgencita.

When it rains, sometimes it pours, but thank God you've got friends holding up umbrellas, who are also ready and willing to splash in puddles with you. Wait for the sun. There's a rainbow right after. I am truly blessed!

Forever in my heart, el tesoro de mi corazon (treasure of my heart), may she rest in peace in Heaven with Jesus and Our Lady of Guadalupe!

12/12 will continue to be a special day!

Feliz Santo a todas las Lupes!

<3